NH COPS COLLAR "TAM MAN" PERV
by
JACK BINKLE
Police in the small New Hampshire town of Norbridge, have apprehended notorious sex offender, Jeffrey "Tam Man" Lidge, who has been wanted for trolling New England public parks and flashing teenage and pubescent boys. The sicko got his nickname from victims' descriptions, which noted that the he always wore a distinctive tam and ascot. Lidge was also carrying a book of the collected poems of Robert Frost at the time of his arrest.
Norbridge Police Captain, Cal Humphert, stated that the Tam Man’s modus operandi was to sit on a public park bench, lure young boys to where he was sitting, and then yank up the book of Robert Frost poetry which was in his lap, giving the victim a real eyeful.
"Two roads diverged in a yellow wood, and he took the one that led to jail," quipped Captain Humphert.
When contacted by the Post, his sister, Molly Lidge, said that her brother was once a respectable citizen, gainfully employed as an air traffic controller. The pantless pervert’s downfall began when President Reagan fired the striking air traffic controllers, and Lidge was unable to procure employment at a comparable salary.
The Tam Man is being held on $100,000.00 bail.
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